By Lisa Cherry

OK, are you ready to go deeper?

Many of us have been pondering the young teen’s question that no Christian mom would want to field…Mom, Would You Love Me If….makes us want to rush to our child’s aid to say “yes” before we ever hear the “IF.”

But this time the question dropped like a bomb in my precious sister’s gut. Bisexual?

When I heard that question, it reminded me of a very personal moment in our family’s history. Two years ago next month, we heard a doctor’s words to my son and daughter-in-law that shook us to the core. Nathan and Tara, I believe your precious little second born has Down Syndrome.

This Grammy’s heart was stunned as the air grew thick and stifling. Tears of grief dripped shamelessly down our cheeks as our breath was shallowed by shock. Our minds, fresh from the drama of birth and scarred from the trauma of their firstborn’s genetic issue, were too raw to even reason much less talk.

But at that poignant moment, we faced the epic question: Would you love me if…?

I don’t think any of us wanted to even voice this obvious question. But subconsciously and spontaneously a chorus of our love gushed forth from our inner souls.

Oh, little Ryan, you are so beautiful and perfect. Mommy loves you. Daddy loves you. Grampy loves you. Grammy loves you. We did not love that little guy less, we loved him more.

Love a child struggling with issues of sexual identity issues who is caught up in the flood of dissipation? You bet.

But how does my grandchild’s genetic issue compare with another child’s “coming out of the closet?”  Contrary to widespread indoctrination, homosexuality has not been proven to have a genetic origin.  Check out this study about it. 

They are not the same, but can you see how the issue of genetics floods the emotions of the situation much like in our scene at the hospital?

Even IF someone were to prove a genetic predisposition, that still does not change our response.  Just because something is “genetic,” it does not make it healthy or normal!

Homosexuality is not normal. It is not safe. It is not God’s design for His children. Those trapped in its lifestyle need God’s deliverance and healing. They will need our love and our help.

How dangerous it becomes when we rename something abnormal as the new “normal.” It opens the door for confusion and grief. Parents, we will need to avoid this temptation.

What would happen if in our “love” for Ryan, we just decided to take a denial approach and rename Trisomy 13 as the new norm? No one would take him to speech and physical therapy. No one would do extra checks on his heart. We would just leave him as he is. Clearly, that is not the love response.

Somehow the issue of taking God’s word on homosexuality has been renamed as “hate.” How sad and how preposterous. God is ready to heal and forgive. He is just looking for His people to come out of the confusion and ask!

“Mom, would you love me if I was bisexual?” 

 Of course, my child. And I would get you some help for your problem!  God has a holy and beautiful plan for your future. He created you in His image, as a sexual creature, illustrating His beauty. We will not give up until we help you experience His good plan.

Here are part 1 and part 2 of this series.

Image courtesy of Wikipedia

Linking to:

Growing Home

Pieces of Amy


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About frontlinemama

I am a mom who is passionate about equipping moms and parents to help their children through the challenging times we live in today.

12 responses »

  1. Angell says:

    Just letting you know that you were featured last week on my blog…you were among the top 3 most viewed linkups! Go grab a featured button!
    http://passionateandcreativehomemaking.blogspot.com/2012/05/reminder-and-link-up.html

  2. Scott says:

    One of the many challenges in this question is that many in the kingdom of darkness have conditioned our culture to accept ‘tolerance” as synonymous with love, and where what is to be tolerated are behavioral choices that are in direct opposition to God’s word. As we read in Ecclesiastes 1:19, there is nothing new under the sun. In Genesis 3:1, the deceiver comes to Eve and asks, “Can it really be that God has said, You shall not…?”. And we are daily confronted with the consequences of that tragic choice to listen to the deceiver.
    Let’s apply this same rhetorical trap to other behavioral choices parents are confronted with today. “Would you love me if you found out I was using and dealing methamphetamines?” And any parent that truly loved that child would do everything they could to turn that child from that path of destruction, and would honestly be negligent if they did not.
    And what a path of destruction homosexuality is! Spiritually it is not only sin, in multiple places such as Lev 18:22 it is called an abomination and clearly homosexuals will not spend eternity in heaven (1 Cor 6:9-10), so apart from repentance, they face an eternity of separation from God. And on this earth, being separated from His wonderful presence, and not walking out the fulfilling calling/purpose our loving Father uniquely has for them.
    In Romans 1, we read that God has given homosexuals over to a reprobate mind or depraved. Please don’t dismiss this as “antiquated religious thought”. The evidence is quite clear in the natural of the consequences of giving themselves over to this grievous choice. Remember, 1 Cor 10:13 we read “No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to us all. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.”
    So let’s examine the consequences and the consistent nature of homosexual behavior. Homosexuals average 24 sex partners a year, who themselves also had 24 over the previous year. Even those in “committed relationships” average 2-3 outside sexual relationships on the side annually. Homosexuals in “committed relationships” also have an unusually high suicide rate. In reports released by the Centers for disease control (quietly as they were quite “politically incorrect”) homosexuals have a crime rate 3 times the rate of non-homosexuals, including driving while impaired. They also engage in sexual acts that expose themselves to internal injuries and infections, and therefore homosexuals are many times more likely to carry multiple STD’s. The picture is from Prov 29:10 “Where there is no revelation, people cast off restraint; but blessed is the one who heeds wisdom’s instruction”. Obviously, there is a deep emptiness in the soul of homosexuals (I can usually see it in their eyes), who are ever trying to fill that emptiness with acts that can never satisfy beyond the moment. The result of this is that homosexuals are found to have a 15-25 year shorter life expectancy depending on the study. There is a way which seems right to a man, But its end is the way of death (Prov 14:12)
    So clearly, loving our children must involve keeping them from exposure to this abomination and the increasingly open indoctrination being forced upon them by the culture. For those who have believed the lie to the point where they wonder if it’s OK to take part in this abomination, who they were born to be, or if what mom, dad and their church has said is just hopelessly outdated, we need to win back their hearts and minds with the truth. Prov 24:11 “Rescue those being led away to death; hold back those staggering toward slaughter”
    And for those who have already engaged in this act of gross deception, it’s NOT too late. For all the incredibly wicked acts of Ahab and Manasseh, God heard their weak repentance. I know 3 EX homosexuals. There are two national groups of ex homosexuals who minister to those wanting to be set free.
    One is PFOX (Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays)
    http://pfox.org/default.html
    Exodus international
    http://exodusinternational.org/about-us
    Remember, Jesus came to set the captives free. Jesus is seated on the throne, high above all powers and dominions. For with God nothing is ever impossible and no word from God shall be without power or impossible of fulfillment (Luke 1:37). Finally, we remember from the parable of the prodigal son, the imagery of the father running to his fallen son.

  3. Alecia says:

    This is such a hard topic, kudos to you for dealing with this straight on. I would still love my child regardless, and would pray I could help them understand what God says about it and that they would accept it as truth.

    • Alecia, I so agree. Nothing could shake my love. Isn’t that an amazing testimony of the Lord’s love of us? Truly my heart aches for the mamas facing this painful battle!

  4. joepote01 says:

    A very good post on a very difficult and sensitive topic.

    Thanks for sharing!

  5. Angie says:

    Wow. thanks for taking on some tough issues. i totally agree.

    • Angie, thanks for commenting. These tough issues are not what I want my kids to have to deal with! But I am confident our Father will lead us in all truth. God bless you.

  6. Wow, what a powerful series. I am a childhood sexual abuse survivor myself and I was never brave enough to confront my parents with a question like this. Instead, I struggled in private for 14 years after the abuse began when I was 8 years old (my abuser was a grown woman). My parents did an excellent job of helping me understand their unconditional love even though they were unable to discover what the source of my pain was (my mother always knew I had been abused, but didn’t learn how until I was 18 and I finally came to her with my story). I would be very interested in reviewing your book for you if you’d be interested. I just ordered a copy via Amazon. I struggle with fear for my own children – especially my girls, because of my own story. When my oldest daughter was 8, I actually experienced a resurgence of PTSD related to my abuse story. I just finally entered counseling for the problem at age 32, and I have been experiencing more deliverance than ever before. Much love to you and your precious daughter.

    • Oh Genevieve, I am so sorry for your pain! Thank you so much for sharing your stuggles with us that we may all benefit. So many are trapped in a lonely place of silence. May God bless you as you mother your children…in His victory. Thanks for ordering the book. I would love your review. If you find it helpful and want to have multiple copies for friends, just let me know. I am passionate about getting these in as many mama hands as possible. While Kalyn and I do not make a personal profit off the book, we gain such satisfaction in knowing others avoid pain.

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